


likes the gentleman not to be gentle

by handsandknees



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Choking, M/M, Making Out, Rough Sex, and a few stupid references you might have to look up to understand, handjobs, the iconic YEEZY sweater
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-08 11:06:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10385307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/handsandknees/pseuds/handsandknees
Summary: Hearing it makes Phil’s face go hot.”Funnily enough, choking is the one kink I don’t actually have.”or, Dan declares he does not have a choking kink and the fans aren't the only ones with raised eyebrows.





	

**Author's Note:**

> just a lot of witty comments and fluff w some smut tbh, enjoy

Dan is very content. 

He’s warm and comfy, and freshly showered, having just filmed, edited, and posted his last official video of 2016. He feels quite good about it, seeing as how it isn’t just clips of him screaming and crying for four minutes. 

That would, after-all, be an accurate synopsis of his year.

However, he opted for doing another ‘Top Dan Memes’ video, because what’s better than basking in the hard work and love of his fucked up fans, whilst also making fun of himself for the entertainment of said fans? Nothing. Mostly.

Dan relaxes back into his nook on the sofa, Macbook propped carefully on his knees while he pulls the long sleeves of his “potato-sack”-Yeezy sweater down over his hands. (It was clean and looked invitingly warm, sue him.) His socked toes curl into the cushion of the sofa mindlessly while he opens Tumblr, for what seems like the billionth time in his existence, a flurry of gifs and screencaps from his new video pouring down his feed. 

Dan’s smile is uncontrollable, really. Snickering quietly to himself, he covers his mouth with the sleeve of his sweater, a few new memes surfacing on his dash every time he refreshes it. He’s certainly glad the video was received well. 

The quiet snickers are enough to summon Phil out from the fluffy confines of his bed, his own socked feet padding down the hallway.

Dan’s head snaps up and he grins over at his partner, shifting in his spot on the couch. 

“Phil, I think I just leveled up,” the brunette laughs, continuing his scrolling.

“Leveld up, huh? You better not be talking about Pokémon Go, we’re supposed to be doing that together,” Phil jokes, settling back into the couch in his respective nook. 

“No, no, although I still think that deal was decided without my own consent,” Dan throws a pointed stare Phil’s way, a small smile pulling on his lips immediately after, “However, I was refering to my meme status. I may have finally reached my true potential.” 

He wipes an imaginary tear from his eye for added effect, laughing mostly at himself. 

“Ahhh, yes, the meme video,” Phil beams, turning the TV on and flipping to a Doctor Who re-run for background noise.

“I swear our fans are like tiny little copies of us, I relate to _literally_ every one of these memes,” Dan continues, more and more tiny laughs slipping out.

Phil turns to look at him, pushing his glasses up on his nose with a fond smile. He knows if he could see himself right now he’d probably look like the epitome of pride. Instead of replying he scoots over to sit in the middle of the couch, slowly pushing the lid of Dan’s laptop closed and holding his arms open wide. 

“If you wanted a good cuddle you could have just asked,” Dan teases, setting his laptop on the end table and shuffling over on his knees to melt against Phil’s chest. 

Phil circles his arm around broad shoulders, the material of Dan’s sweater soft under his fingertips. 

“But it’s much more fun to coerce you into everything.” Phil props his head on top of Dan’s, a few of his new-found curls tickling at the underside of his chin. 

The feeling makes him smile. 

Dan is definitely not the same tiny, insecure eighteen year old he rescued nearly eight years ago. He’s not the kid who would hide his face the first few times they’d videochat, or the one who felt like anything he did wasn’t good enough. To see him let his hair down, literally and metaphorically, is nothing short of amazing, Phil thinks. 

“You huge nuisance, I’m going to start coercing you into things,” Dan simpers, turning his head to grin up at his boyfriend, “I’ll say _’Phil, can you come in here for a second.’_ and then just shove a pan in your face. And BAM you cook dinner. How would you like that?” 

“When’s the last time you cooked dinner, anyway? That’s something that already happens,” Phil replies with a smug smile. 

Dan simply rolls his eyes and wraps his arms tighter around Phil’s middle, refusing to dig himself a deeper hole and let Phil win the pretend argument. Phil hums triumphantly, mumbling a quiet “thought so”, before pulling Dan closer into his side. 

 

A couple of hours later and Dan is sound asleep, having taken Phil’s lap for a pillow. Phil had fallen asleep as well, glasses crooked on his face when he wakes up. He comes to the conclusion Dan might scalp him if he tries to get up, let alone moves, so he instead opts for scrolling through Twitter. 

It only takes Phil a total of two minutes and he’s come across hundreds of tweets about Dan’s new video. Some of them are sweet compliments, others….not so much. Phil can’t keep track of how many “FUCK ME UP”’s, and just generally extreme comments he sees, but that’s one of the things they like most about their fanbase, how passionate they are. 

As he continues scrolling, one tweet in particular catches his eye. 

**_@powerpuffdan:  
did u just literally admit to everyone that ur kinky in a video….DAD._ **

A few of the replies that follow that one have Phil raising his eyebrows and a strange stir twisting in his stomach.

The thing is, Phil hadn’t exactly _watched_ the video yet. He’d gotten the notification for it on his phone, and giggled at the creative thumbnail, but his brain was more focused on achieving maximum cuddle status with his real life Dan. 

Phil quickly clicks out of twitter and opens up YouTube, Dan’s video being the first to load up. He taps on it and keeps the volume low to keep from waking Dan with his own exceptionally loud voice, but is already chuckling thirty seconds in, causing the boy in his lap to stir a bit. 

The video is classic Dan: sarcastic, witty, and self-deprecating. That much Phil expected. What he didn’t expect was to actually hear his boyfriend proclaim to the Internet that he is, in fact, kinky.

Hearing it makes Phil’s face go hot. 

_”Funnily enough, choking is the one kink I don’t actually have.”_

Phil wishes he could call his bluff. He really, really does. Because, they are plenty kinky. 

Before Phil, Dan had never even been with another boy, but together they found what really made each other tick, what made the other’s skin itch and stars burst behind their eyelids from the smallest of touches.

They’d messed around with bondage, very fun, sex toys, also fun but mainly reserved for when they’re far away from each other, things involving food, way too messy and sticky for a clean freak like Dan, spanking, fun, hair pulling, _very_ fun. They worked well with one another, somehow. 

Dan, Phil discovered, was very eager to please. Specifically when being told what to do, something that was very out of character for him in day to day life but not in the bedroom.

Phil on the other hand, was extremely happy to tell him what to do. To hold him down, tie him up, _rough_ him up if he wanted. (Resulting, occasionally, in a pre-recorded gaming video being uploaded because it wouldn’t look very good to the fans if Dan showed up on camera littered in bruises.) 

Despite all of this, Dan was right. Partially at least. They had never ventured into choking. Maybe because Dan had no interest in it, or maybe because it had never come up in conversation. 

Phil gazed down at his sleeping partner, Dan’s eyelashes fluttering as his eyes moved beneath his lids, lips parted just so. 

With a feather light touch, Phil runs his fingertips from the soft hair just behind Dan’s ear down to his collar bone. 

He can’t deny it’s tempting. 

The light touch however, jostles the younger boy awake and he looks up with tired eyes and a sleepy smile. 

Phil, clever boy, runs his hand through Dan’s messy hair to try and play off the tender touch as just that. 

“What time is it,” Dan yawns, nuzzling his face into Phil’s pajama covered leg. 

“Time for Danny boy’s to eat, I’d say,” Phil chuckles, both of their ears perking up at the quiet grumble of his stomach. 

“Touché. Make me breakfast, I want waffles.”

Phil laughs lightly, ruffling Dan’s hair as he sits up. “It’s 10pm, but okay.”

 

It doesn’t take long to make them both food, considering after a long day of binge watching Stranger Things they’d stocked up on not one, not two, but _three_ different kinds of Eggo waffles. It’s a little funny. 

 

“Do you think other animals can have their own pets?” Dan questions with syrup smeared across the corner of his mouth. 

“I don’t think most animals have that kind of higher level thinking. Or the patience. I have to deal with you everyday and you are the equivalent of a shih tzu with a Napoleon Complex.”

Phil is promptly hit in the face with one of their sofa pillows, which nearly sends his plate of waffles toppling to the floor. 

“Better than living with a florist who can’t even be bothered to water one of his nine houseplants,” Dan chides, sneaky smile on his lips, “Twat.”

“Dork,” Phil combats, shoving the last bite of his waffle into his mouth.

“Loser.”

They smile for a long moment before Dan scoots closer to rest his legs in Phil’s lap. They stay like that for a long while, until it’s midnight and they’re both yawning, surprisingly.

Dan noses at Phil’s jaw, staring at him expectantly, Phil, in turn, has to chew at his lip to stop from smiling.

“Yes?”

“Bed, Phil. I’m tired and full of exactly five waffles, not a good combination.”

“Well, let’s go then,” he grins, going to nudge Dan’s legs off. 

“Oh no….whatever will I do….my legs have turned to jelly.”

“Jesus.”

“Phil, I’m afraid you’ll have to carry me. I’ve thought it through from every other angle, this is the only way.”

“Fiiiiine,” they both laugh as Phil crouches down to let Dan climb on his back before starting towards the bedrooms. 

“Yours or mine?”

“Hmmmm….yours because I’m 10/10 sure that’s where my phone charger is.”

“Perfect reasoning.”

That earns the older boy a wet kiss on the cheek, Phil nudging his door open before practically tossing Dan off his back. 

Dan lets out a disgruntled noise, propping himself up on his elbows with an unimpressed expression. “Heathen.”

“I don’t think that’s the proper use of that word, so I’m going to count that as a win for me.”

“Says the man who thinks he breaks the bloody sound barrier on a daily basis.”

“Listen! I watch a lot of Cosmos episodes, okay? You can’t blame me for wanting to be Neil deGrasse Tyson. He’s a genius.”

“Phil, you’re a lanky, white, British- not mention gay- man. You will never be Neil deGrasse Tyson.”

“I hope I wake up as Neil deGrasse Tyson just to prove my point.”

“I would murder you. I would, don’t test me Philly.”

Phil simply climbs onto the bed, dragging Dan under the covers and pulling them over both of their heads. 

“You wouldn’t murder me,” he sighs happily, leaving a soft peck on Dan’s lips.

Dan stares at him skeptically for a moment, returning the short lived kiss before nodding. “Okay, yes fine. I wouldn’t.”

“Ha. Gotcha!”

They both let out a few quiet laughs, Dan’s eyes flitting down to Phil’s lips before slowly dragging back up to meet his gaze.

“Y’know what…,” Dan says, tucking his arm up under his head to rest on.

Phil chuckles and copies Dan’s movements, their faces now just a few inches apart. “What?”

“I think we should make out. For safety of course. What if by some sick twist of fate, you actually wake up as Neil deGrasse Tyson? I don’t know if making out with my boyfriend while he’s trapped in an astrophysicist’s body would do my mental health any good-”

Dan is nearly cut short, Phil surging forward and slotting their lips together in a sweet, but firm kiss. 

With a careful hand placed on his cheek, Phil parts his lips and deepens the kiss, sitting up on his elbow to get a better angle.

It’s like clockwork when they kiss like this. Dan melts into the bed, or couch- or on a few occasions, the wall- and from there it’s roaming hands and the slight scrape of teeth against lips. 

Dan fits his arms around Phil’s neck, pulling him closer while their tongues brush together with a wet noise. 

It’s getting uncomfortably humid under the covers with the heavy breaths they’re both letting out, so Phil takes it upon himself to push them down over his shoulders, then moving to hover above Dan with their legs slotted together perfectly. 

With the insistent press of Phil’s leg between his own, Dan lets out something between a moan and a sigh, their kiss staying languid and slow. The tangle of Phil’s hand in his tousled hair is unmissable, his fingers curling around the roots and giving a teasing tug. 

“ _Shit_ ,” Dan mutters, arching his back to press their chests together. He’s impatient now. Unable to lean up into the kiss, he catches Phil’s bottom lip between his teeth to emphasize his point. 

“You’re insufferable, really,” Phil says with a breathless laugh.

“I wouldn’t be if you’d’ve paid any attention to me earlier. What’s the fun in being an adult if you can’t occasionally put off work to satisfy your very dashing boyfriend?”

“See, but then you wouldn’t get as desperate for it later on.”

The statement has Dan going quiet, his head pushing up into the incessant tug of Phil’s hand in his hair.

“That’s what you are, right?,” Phil says, smirk audible in his tone of voice, “You’re desperate...might even beg if I hold you off long enough.”

The nod Dan gives is all it takes and they’re kissing again, this time with more intent. Phil sucks on the younger boy’s tongue, pulling back to brush their lips together carefully. 

“So I got the chance to watch your video earlier..,” Phil starts.

“Yeah, and?” Dan is ninety-eight percent sure they could be doing much more interesting things than talking about his video. The impatience practically radiates off of him.

“ _And_ , I seem to remember you mentioning something quite interesting.”

“Phil..everything in that video is comedy gold, of course I mentioned something interesting.”

“Well Daniel, if you’ll allow me to finish-”

“My hand is about 3 inches from your dick Phil Lester, and I _**will**_ pinch it.”

Phil reaches up with his unoccupied hand, settling his palm and fingers firmly around the pale column of Dan’s throat, raising a challenging eyebrow up at him. 

Dan freezes, his eyes widening a fraction and his lips parting around a silent gasp. 

“Phil, I-,” he can barely get two words out before the hand around his throat is tightening enough to silence him, Phil’s eyes narrowing. 

“I seem to recall you saying something about choking not being on your extensive list of kinks. Care to elaborate?”

Phil’s hand loosens a bit to allow Dan adequate air to get his words out, the boy beneath him letting out a heavy breath. 

“I..er….I suppose that was a bit of a lie, wasn’t it?,” Dan says quietly, cheeks rosy and a coy smile on his lips.

“Clearly.”

“Just to clarify, I do thoroughly enjoy everything about this situation.”

Phil knows he doesn’t need to respond at that point, he knows Dan too well. He knows he’d much rather have Phil’s fingers drawing noises out of him rather than some half-assed, distracted reply that would only keep them from getting to the task at hand. 

They both give a silent prayer out to whatever higher power inspired Dan to not put any trousers on after his shower, his bottom half clad in only a fitted pair of black boxer-briefs. Phil is hasty in yanking those off, along with Dan’s sweater, tossing them both on the floor next to the bed before ridding himself of his own pajama pants. 

“Phil,” comes from below him, Dan’s voice restless and his hips lifting up to brush as best they can against Phil’s own. 

“I can only move so quickly,” he laughs, finally grinding their hips together. He can feel that they’re both a little more than half-hard, shivers crawling up his spine and willing him to roll his hips faster.

“Please.” It’s only a quiet, half moaned whisper but Phil still catches it.

 _’There it is.’_ Phil thinks to himself. He’s already got him begging and they’ve not even touched each other properly yet. This might be a new record. 

With practiced ease, Phil reaches up to graze the pads of his first three fingers over Dan’s bottom lip, his mouth opening almost immediately.

Dan makes quick work of getting Phil’s fingers thoroughly wet, tongue tracing the inseams of the digits while the older man presses his fingers farther into his mouth.

Soon enough, the latter is pulling his fingers out and progressing to prodding them against the tight rim of Dan’s hole. 

“Fuck, could you go any slower?,” Dan whines, trying to press down against the teasing press of Phil’s fingers, 

Without much warning or resistance, Phil pushes two long fingers into him, effectively hushing the needy boy and instead pulling a satisfied groan from his lips.

“Still have anything smart to say, hmm?,” Phil smirks, curling his fingers and moving them in and out at slow pace, moving his other hand back up to wrap solidly around Dan’s throat.

It’s all Dan can do to not let out an embarrassingly loud moan, the noise getting caught in his chest and coming out muffled and low.

“N..No..please, I can be good, just- more.”

Phil is all too pleased with himself, cocky smile playing on his lips while he pushes a third finger in, speeding up his pace with more intent to actually open Dan up. 

“Dunno if you really deserve anymore. Maybe I’ll just fuck you with my fingers, nothing else,” his hand tightens around Dan’s throat just to see his eyes glaze over, face and chest going flush. 

“Next time you want a good-morning-blow job, I guess I’ll just leave you to finish by yourself as well,” Dan hisses, pushing his hips down to get Phil’s fingers deeper inside him anyway.

Phil decides he is absolutely not doing a proper job if Dan can still form coherent sentences, nudging his fingers right against his spot to try and silence him. 

The younger boy gasps, an eager moan pouring out of his mouth while Phil’s hand stays taut around his throat, fingers jabbing expertly at his prostate. 

“Brat.” It’s muttered quietly, but there’s fond laced in Phil’s voice nonetheless. 

Dan seems quite happy with Phil’s fingers now, giving him the perfect opportunity to pull them out just to hear the brunette whine for more. 

“Jesus, how hard is it to just _fuck me_ ,” Dan bites, nails digging into Phil’s shoulders. That earns him a tight squeeze, choking on what little air he’s able to suck into his lungs. 

“I think you’re forgetting who makes the rules, babe.” It’s said so casually that Dan can feel the power radiating off of the boy above him, the feeling making his whole body vibrate. 

Phil shoves his boxers off, kicking them away and leaning over to retrieve the half empty bottle of lube from his bedside drawer. He then realizes he should probably ease up with his hand around Dan’s throat, his face a cherry red but his facial expression that of satisfaction. 

Phil pulls his hand away entirely, causing Dan to splutter and cough, taking deep breaths while he reaches down to palm himself. He hadn’t realized how much he’d truly like being choked, but if the nearly painful degree of hardness he finds himself at is anything to go by, he might like it too much.

Wasting little time, Phil rubs a generous amount of lube over his length and wipes the excess over Dan’s hole. The action makes his body to jerk, every tiny touch going directly to his cock. 

“Since you insist on running your mouth so much, I suppose I’ll just have to fuck the words out of you,” Phil practically sighs, rubbing the thick tip of his cock teasingly over Dan’s entrance. 

Admittedly, Dan wants to come up with a witty clap back, but the promise of getting fucked so thoroughly is enough to quiet him. However, it doesn’t keep the presumptuous smile off his lips. 

Rather than teasing Dan like he usually would, Phil pushes up into him harshly, the snap of his hips audible in the intimate quiet of the room.

“Fuck,” the word comes out breathless and strained with the now familiar pressure of Phil’s hand around his throat.

The older boy simply chuckles, letting out a string of groans while he begins to rabbit his hips up into his partner. 

Dan’s mouth opens around a silent moan, the hand around his neck keeping any noises from escaping as Phil’s cock pounds into him, brushing his spot minutely. 

“What’s wrong, love?,” Phil pants, smirk returning, “Cat got your tongue.”

Eyes rolling back with the feeling, Dan forces out a loud moan, one hand reaching to grip at the soft sheets below him. Normally, he’d give a half-hearted retort but he can barely comprehend Phil’s words with the overload of pleasure. 

Pausing to catch his breath, Phil shifts Dan’s legs open wider, hips rocking forward and the angle changing. The hard press of Dan’s fingertips into his hips and the crinkle between his eyebrows tells the older man he’s _really_ found the right spot now and he pushes impossibly deeper into him.

That’s how it happens. With Phil’s large hand splayed around his throat and his cock buried inside of him, Dan cums messily over his stomach, letting out a quiet string of whimpers.

As usual, the feeling of Dan going tight around him is almost enough to have Phil coming too, but he pulls out instead. With slippery fingers, he jerks himself off, soon shooting over Dan’s own spent cock and lifting his hand from his throat. 

They both breathe each other in while they come down from their orgasms, Phil leaning their sweat slick foreheads together. 

“Still think you don’t like choking?”

“Eh, it’s okay,” Dan smiles, voice hoarse and crackly.

 

They use what little energy they can muster up to rinse off in a warm shower, Dan rubbing tiny circles into Phil’s shoulders like usual. 

When they finally settle down into bed, lights off and duvet tucked up to their chins, Dan laces their fingers together.

“Phil?”

“Yes, Bear?”

“Please don’t wake up as Neil deGrasse Tyson…”

They both burst into fits of laughter, exchanging goodnight kisses and falling into a deep sleep in no time.

 

(Phil does not wake up as Neil deGrasse Tyson, but Dan is sad to admit he was hesitant to open his eyes the next morning. They are very in love.)

**Author's Note:**

> i love phan idk why it took me this long to write a fic about them lmao. thanks for reading (-':


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